The path of years is wide and cold, unclear
No light or tracks to guide you on your way.
And all dark caves that come to instill fear
Approach closer with every lasting day.
But through these hardships blindly do I go
For there is light in all the blackest caves.
Where others stumble, I have stars to show
And passed the rocks and tricks their guiding saves.
My aide comes in the way of hearts of gold
That comfort, nurture, laugh and gaze the skies
And in the face of danger they are bold,
While in their company time’s passage flies.
Without these hints and comforts all light lends
Where would I be were it not for my friends?
No light or tracks to guide you on your way.
And all dark caves that come to instill fear
Approach closer with every lasting day.
But through these hardships blindly do I go
For there is light in all the blackest caves.
Where others stumble, I have stars to show
And passed the rocks and tricks their guiding saves.
My aide comes in the way of hearts of gold
That comfort, nurture, laugh and gaze the skies
And in the face of danger they are bold,
While in their company time’s passage flies.
Without these hints and comforts all light lends
Where would I be were it not for my friends?
The “Path of Years,” is, obviously, the first line of my sonnet. Although it may seem generic to include such an apparent and blunt title, it seemed to me the most fitting. The “Path of Years,” could be thought of as a synonym for the “Journey of Life,” or it could be put into a different perspective: The “Journey of Life” implies the decisions and lessons learned as one goes through life. By the “Path of Years,” I meant to touch not on the choices and lessons learned throughout life, but more toward seeing life as it goes by. It could be described as someone looking back at all past hardships and reflecting. That is not the intent of my poem, but the point of view would best be characterized this way; it is a detached view of someone traveling along a pathway. There are rocks on this path, tricky areas, and shadows. However, these things are what make it a path. Time passes transparently through us all, to turn it into a Path of Years.
The path of years is wide and cold, unclear
No light or tracks to guide you on your way.
And all dark caves that come to instill fear
Approach closer with every lasting day.
No light or tracks to guide you on your way.
And all dark caves that come to instill fear
Approach closer with every lasting day.
Lines one and two are simple descriptions. The words I use- “wide”, “cold”, and “unclear”- would be easily applicable to a literal path, and I mean them in quite the same way metaphorically. Being wide, the path allows flexibility. It isn’t straight cut, without leaving room for missteps or maneuvering. This path is cold; in a harsh, unforgiving way. There isn’t any turning back or erasing mistakes. “Unclear” refers to how the path is unpredictable. The image I’m trying to portray is something unfathomable, not unlike that of fog in the distance, just like the future is. We are going through our lives blindly, in a sense. There’s nothing there lighting the way or leaving behind a “trail” for us to follow.
The dark cave that I refer to in line three shouldn’t be taken as imagery for the whole sonnet. The “dark cave” merely refers to a looming challenge or difficulty. You watch it approach, closer and closer, day by day. This anticipation is one of the many haunting aspects of life. But when the time comes that “it” finally arrives, we often realize that “it” isn’t so scary as we anticipated.
But through these hardships blindly do I go
For there is light in all the blackest caves.
Where others stumble, I have stars to show
And passed the rocks and tricks their guiding saves.
For there is light in all the blackest caves.
Where others stumble, I have stars to show
And passed the rocks and tricks their guiding saves.
The second stanza summarizes vaguely the true topic of my sonnet. The first two lines here reveal that in the hardest of times, the blackest caves, I have help; I have light. I don’t notice the difficulties I pass through; I am blind to the roughest parts of my path. Without this light, many stumble- rocks on the path are often difficult to avoid. My hardships are eased, however, because I have “stars” to lead me past them. That is the general gist of this verse. Another sense that a person could obtain from it is that of innocence, or oblivion. Specifically in the first line, I state that I am “blind.” Despite the many good aspects of my guiding light, it also hinders me in the way that I am unaware of what hardship or struggle is and therefore make up my own interpretations of life that may or may not be accurate. This is a much more dark interpretation of this stanza. Although it is not the main idea I was trying to communicate, it’s one of the important ones that give more diversity to the sonnet as a whole.
My aide comes in the way of hearts of gold
That comfort, nurture, laugh and gaze the skies
And in the face of danger they are bold,
While in their company time’s passage flies.
That comfort, nurture, laugh and gaze the skies
And in the face of danger they are bold,
While in their company time’s passage flies.
The third stanza is a description. I comment on the characteristics of my “guiding light” and how it helps me and affects my life. The very first line of this stanza includes a pun; I use the word “aide” as instead of “aid,” which would be expected in this context. This little change in spelling is a small hint as to what my savior/s actually is/are. An ”aide” is an actual person or assistant who helps, while “aid” is the noun for “help” or “assistance.” The descriptions here are pretty cut-and-dry. Line two might amount to confusion at this point in the sonnet, but this will be resolved later. Line two mentions some of the many simple things that I appreciate and hold dear; what makes my savior/s important to me. Line three is my acknowledgment of the hero within, because every hero needs to have courage. I owe much of the courage I get in life to the subjects of this poem, and it would not be doing justice to neglect the great strength that they give me in the worst of times. “While in their company time’s passage flies,” is a baffling line, before the subject is figured out. However, it is the easiest to understand once the poem is revealed, and leads the most into the final stanza.
Without these hints and comforts all light lends
Where would I be were it not for my friends?
Where would I be were it not for my friends?
The last two lines of my sonnet sum everything up. Throughout the entire poem, I intentionally kept it a mystery what the object of my description was, although it’s meaning has been getting clearer and clearer with the hints in the third stanza. Finally,my subjects are exposed! To any reader of any age, the characterizations I placed with my “saviors” will be accurate depictions of one of the world’s most important beauties: friendship.
3 comments:
Hey Ming! I relished your poem because of its ingenious simplicity. It was precise and to the point, giving every word in your poem a very important role to play. Each word was significant and placed there by you for a specific purpose. I loved your poem because it was touching and heartfelt. I feel the very same way about my friends.
In the first paragraph line three “The ‘Path of Years,’ could be thought of as a synonym for the ‘Journey of Life,’ or it could be put into a different perspective:” You should change ‘synonym’ to metaphor I think. The second paragraph was very descriptive and you display amazing vocabulary. The wonderful picture that you have drawn with you poem is not becoming filled in with color and flowery adjectives that you used in this second paragraph.
“However, then, it ‘turns to fade into the coming day’; There’s always something else looming ahead, waiting in the future.” This line is found in the second paragraph the last line. It is a bit unclear and I have difficulty following it. You may want to re-word it or keep it and expand off of it. I don’t get it because “turns to fade” sounds like your troubles are past and not “looming ahead”.
I loved the second to the last paragraph, the second part of it. It was especially fascinating because it built up excitement and suspense to the revealing of who your heroes really were. These lines provided great support with out giving away the punch line which was delivered terrifically.
Very good all in all. I would clear up some unclear sentences and re-word them. You can do this by reading your paper out loud to yourself or someone else. You might be surprised at what good will come out of this. You had me guessing throughout the entire poem and analysis, who your heroes were. This is the spice of your paper that intrigues readers but however if you do this readers might get confused in the beginning and when you explain your poem in your analysis the readers might not read far enough to discover your theme, so you might want to introduce your “intent of your poem” in the first paragraph instead of the third.
I give this paper 96 out of 100. Awesome!
-Ethan
hi mingy!
i like how you have so much symbolism. it's super good. i really like the "aide" part and i also really like your last line. it's actually kind of funny that you use the word "subject" to describe friends so that you don't give away what you're actually talking about till the end.
there i left a comment. happy? hehe.
The path of years is wide and cold, unclear
No light or tracks to guide you on your way.
When there seems a dark cave approaching near
It turns to fade into the coming day.
But through these hardships blindly do I go
For there is light in all the blackest caves.
Where others stumble, I have stars to show
And passed the rocks and tricks their guiding saves.
My aide comes in the way of hearts of gold
That comfort, nurture, laugh and gaze the skies
And in the face of danger they are bold,
While in their company time’s passage flies.
Without these hints and comforts all light lends
Where would I be were it not for my friends?
The “Path of Years,” is, obviously, the first line of my sonnet. Although it may seem generic to include such an apparent and blunt title, it seemed to me the most fitting. The “Path of Years,” could be thought of as a synonym for the “Journey of Life,” or it could be put into a different perspective: The “Journey of Life” implies the decisions and lessons learned as one goes through life. By the “Path of Years,” I meant to touch not on the choices and lessons learned throughout life, but more toward seeing life as it goes by. It could be described as someone looking back at all past hardships and reflecting. That is not the intent of my poem, but the point of view would best be characterized this way; it is a detached view of someone traveling along a pathway. There are rocks on this path, tricky areas, and shadows. However, these things are what make it a path. Time passes transparently through us all, to turn it into a Path of Years.
This is a very effective opening paragraph to the sonnet. Though, I think that you could have opened your paper in a more creative way, something that will hook the reader a little more effectively. I think maybe a quote pertaining to the dealings of the journey of life would be a great way to hook in readers. Aside from that, I really think this is a perfect opening paragraph. I liked the ways you explained your main idea, but in a way not to reveal the true message.
The path of years is wide and cold, unclear
No light or tracks to guide you on your way.
When there seems a dark cave approaching near
It turns to fade into the coming day.
Lines one and two are simple descriptions. The words I use- “wide”, “cold”, and “unclear”- would be easily applicable to a literal path, and I mean them in quite the same way metaphorically. Being wide, the path allows flexibility. It isn’t straight cut, without leaving room for missteps or maneuvering. This path is cold; in a harsh, unforgiving way. There isn’t any turning back or erasing mistakes. “Unclear” refers to how the path is unpredictable. The image I’m trying to portray is something unfathomable, not unlike that of fog in the distance, just like the future is. We are going through our lives blindly, in a sense. There’s nothing there lighting the way or leaving behind a “trail” for us to follow. The dark cave that I refer to in line three shouldn’t be taken as imagery for the whole sonnet. The “dark cave” merely refers to a looming challenge or difficulty that is inevitable. You watch it approach, closer and closer, day by day. When the time comes that it finally arrives, we often realize that it isn’t so scary as we anticipated. However, then, it “turns to fade into the coming day”; there’s always something else looming ahead, waiting in the future.
You do an excellent job of breaking down the first stanza of your sonnet. I really liked the dark cave metaphor, because it is one that we have all recently faced. I think you can give examples of the dark caves in our life, and by doing this you could really emphasis your already excellent point.
But through these hardships blindly do I go
For there is light in all the blackest caves.
Where others stumble, I have stars to show
And passed the rocks and tricks their guiding saves.
The second stanza summarizes vaguely the true topic of my sonnet. The first two lines here reveal that in the hardest of times, the blackest caves, I have help; I have light. I don’t notice the difficulties I pass through; I am blind to the roughest parts of my path. Without this light, many stumble- rocks on the path are often difficult to avoid. My hardships are eased, however, because I have “stars” to lead me past them. That is the general gist of this verse. Another sense that a person could obtain from it is that of innocence, or oblivion. Specifically in the first line, I state that I am “blind.” Despite the many good aspects of my guiding light, it also hinders me in the way that I am unaware of what hardship or struggle is and therefore make up my own interpretations of life that may or may not be accurate. This is a much more dark interpretation of this stanza. Although it is not the main idea I was trying to communicate, it’s one of the important ones that give more diversity to the sonnet as a whole.
The sentence I bolded confused me a little. I wasn’t sure what you were really trying to say about the guiding light.
My aide comes in the way of hearts of gold
That comfort, nurture, laugh and gaze the skies
And in the face of danger they are bold,
While in their company time’s passage flies.
The third stanza is a description. I comment on the characteristics of my “guiding light” and how it helps me and affects my life. The very first line of this stanza includes a pun; I use the word “aide” as instead of “aid,” which would be expected in this context. This little change in spelling is a small hint as to what my savior/s actually is/are. ”Aide” is an actual person or assistant who helps, while “aid” is the noun for “help” or “assistance.” The descriptions here are pretty cut-and-dry. Line two might amount to confusion at this point in the sonnet, but this will be resolved later. Line two mentions some of the many simple things that I appreciate and hold dear; what makes my savior/s important to me. Line three is my acknowledgment of the hero within, because every hero needs to have courage. I owe much of the courage I get in life to the subjects of this poem, and it would not be doing justice to neglect the great strength that they give me in the worst of times. “While in their company time’s passage flies,” is a baffling line, before the subject is figured out. However, it is the easiest to understand once the poem is revealed, and leads the most into the final stanza.
Without these hints and comforts all light lends
Where would I be were it not for my friends?
The last two lines of my sonnet sum everything up. Throughout the entire poem, I intentionally kept it a mystery what the object of my description was, although it’s meaning has been getting clearer and clearer with the hints in the third stanza. Finally, my subjects are exposed! To any reader of any age, the characterizations I placed with my “saviors” will be accurate depictions of one of the world’s most important beauties: friendship.
The last two paragraphs of your paper are top-notch. You explained every line extremely well, and you ended it effectively with your main them. Other than a few small things this paper was excellent. 94/100.
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